Former Ole’ Miss Softball Standout Hailey Lunderman-Ellingburg (MBCI/Lakota) Talks about her Mental Health Struggle and Her Journey Through It!

My name is Hailey Lunderman-Ellingburg and I am a member of the Mississippi Band of Choctaw Indians. I am also of the Sicangu Oyate (Rosebud Sioux Tribe). My Lakota name is Anpo Luta Win which translates to Red Dawn Woman in English. 

I am writing this story as a way to help my fellow Indigenous athletes by telling my story. First, I am going to give a description of my softball career from Club Ball to College. Then, I will tell you about my struggles with mental health. This story is more of a short condensed version of my life without all the little details, but I get the main points across. 

Club Ball:

I began my softball career at a young age. I have been playing organized softball since the age of seven. I played with a team called “Southern Belles” which was coached by Rocky Higginbotham, Richard Herring, and Shane Baty. My time with this team ranged from the age of 7-11 y/o. I started out playing in coach pitch tournaments to slow-pitch tournaments then transitioned into fastpitch tournaments with this team. Upon departure from this team, I was given the opportunity to pick-up with a team known as “Velocity Gulf Coast” coached by Tommy Castenado and Randy Bishop. I remember that during one of those games that I had turned a double play at shortstop, and Kevin Burge (a player’s father) told one of the coaches “That’s your shortstop”. This began my career at shortstop. I had always played second base and outfield up to this point. I played with this team from the age of 11-18 y/o. We were a pretty good team. Majority of the tournaments that we played in, we usually played an age up. Sometimes we would play in 18U tournaments when we were supposed to be in 14U, and we would win the whole tournament. There were two instances that I did not play with this team for the summer. I went and visited my father in South Dakota for a summer in 2012 (if i remember correctly), and I played with the Rapid City Rebels. Another summer, I traveled to California and played with Team Mizuno, which ultimately helped my recruiting process. This California trip led to me being recruited by the University of Mississippi (Ole Miss) as well as other schools. 

High School:

I attended Neshoba Central High School from 2011-2015. During my high school softball career, I was awarded many accolades including six state championships in slowpitch (3) and fastpitch (3). Some accolades include  all-district, all-state, and all-region. Here are some of my accomplishments that I am most proud:

• 2013 Class 5A softball Player of the Year 
• 2014 Dandy Dozen Selection
• 2015 MaxPreps All-American 
• 2015 Mississippi Softball Gatorade Player of the Year
• 2015 Mississippi Female Athlete of the Year 
• Played a total of 130 games in high school with a .578 average. Totaled 213 runs scored, 245 hits, 109 RBI, 31 doubles, 21 triples, 11 home runs, an on-base percentage of .628, 1.456 OPS and 94 stolen bases 

College:

I attended the University of Mississippi from 2015-2021. I attended Holmes Community College in the Spring of 2021. During my college softball career, I was awarded many accolades which include: 

• 2016 Named a Top-10 Finalist for the NFCA/Schutt Sport Division I National Freshman of the Year 
• 2016 SEC ALL-FRESHMAN Team
• 2016 Freshman Leader for hits in the SEC
• Was in the May 9 (2016) issue of Sports Illustrated as one of the athletes in the “Faces in the Crowd”

*I decided not to play after my freshman year of college at the University of Mississippi due to mental health issues that I have struggled with since. In 2021, I decided that I wanted to pursue softball again which led to an opportunity to play at Holmes Community College.*

• 2021 ALL-MACCC TEAM
• NFCA ALL AMERICAN TEAM (JUCO)
• NJCAA ALL-REGION XXIII TEAM 
• (2021) .519 average including 17 doubles, four triples and three home runs. I had 16 steals on the year.

If you have made it this far, I understand you may be wondering what happened after my freshman year of college. The only answer I really can give you is that I struggle with mental health. I was professionally diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety and Depression in the Fall of 2016, which would be my sophomore year of college. However, I have had these symptoms of anxiety and depression all throughout my adolescence. I believe that a lot of these issues stemmed from medical issues within three immediate family members as well as dealing with other family issues. Also, racist incidents that have affected me. I am also very socially awkward and suffer from social anxiety. My anxiety and depression had gotten so bad while I was attending the University of Mississippi that I was having suicidal ideations. Softball was usually my escape from reality, but it eventually was adding on to my stress. So, I decided to walk away. I was put on medication to help with my depression and anxiety and continued my education at the University of Mississippi.

Fast Forward five years later, I decided that I wanted to pursue softball again. This led to an opportunity to play at Holmes Community College. This past June, I tried out for a professional softball league where I was selected to be a part of a non-contractual Reserve List. If my name is called, I will be given a contract. I have every intention of becoming a professional softball player in the future and I believe I may be the first from my tribe to be a professional athlete if everything works out. My family and I are also in the works of forming an Indigenous National Softball Team. Once this takes off, I will be looking for donations, fundraising opportunities, etc. I also have been applying for grants to help with this non-profit organization that we are trying to form. Personally, I am currently looking for sponsorships and endorsements to help pay for training, travel, community events, etc. I want to give back to my community to help further Native Athletes and I want to be a Mental Health Advocate for my Tribe as I have just finished my Bachelor’s degree in Psychology with a minor in Sociology from the University of Mississippi. 

I want to end this article/story by talking about mental health. In the United States, Native Americans experience higher rates of suicide than any other racial and ethnic groups in the United States. According to a 2019 article from the National Indian Council on Aging (NICOA), for Native youth ages 10 to 24, suicide is the second leading cause of death. The youth suicide rate is also 2.5 times higher than the national overall average. Mental Health matters among our Native communities. We need to reach a point where there is not a stigma surrounding Mental Health among our communities. We need to be able to have open discussions to express our feelings without people dismissing our feelings. Lastly, we need to have greater access to Mental Health Services within our communities and treat mental health as we treat physical health. 

Thank you for reading my story. If you would like to follow along my journey, I am going to start posting on my socials more. Feel free to contact me at any of the following: 

Twitter: helling_22

Instagram: helling_22

Facebook: Hailey Lunderman Ellingburg

Email: hbellingburg22@gmail.com